thanksgiving freebies

miss l and i started our holiday journey by plundering dumpsters. oh, holy bounty! i had so many perishables that i had people over for a brunch the other day.
t-day i went to green county where i said "boner" twice and "goddammit" once in front of old religious relatives. these are people who say grace before eating and swear up and down that tattoos are evil. they mean well, but i really am their little token black sheep. they humor me but don't want their kids to take me seriously. because having babies at 17 and out of wedlock is soo much better. my mom was proud of my bounty until she looked around and realized that she was supposed to be embarrassed by me. i was talking to my favorite aunt in the kitchen and i think my thoughts on government and politics offended her. i didn't realize she was such a corporatist. that kind of made me sad because i wanted her to think that i'm awesome and back me up. i was telling her about my busking/roller clown idea and she was trying to dissuade me. meanwhile i was trying to get her to realize that she was a bought woman and to see my pov on anarchism. now i just kind of feel sorry for her.
then i went to tijuanna's where there was even more food and six kinds of pie! hustler got to play with lots of dogs and i got to detox from rural indiana.
i also skated and drank and had horrible sinus headaches. and sang karaoke to Loretta Lynn, "don't come home a drinkin'." it was less of singing and more of howling, but i'm giving myself credit for it anyways.
but get this- sunday i went for dinner at my momma's and she gave my these pants she got at the dump! gloria vanderbilt high-wasted, skinny jeans, in a fruit stripe pattern. i. am. going. to. wear. these. all. week. long. i want to see how long it will take people to say something to me about them. fantastic! i'll be like the german exchange student in 11th grade econ., only without the moose knuckles.